Why We are a We

One of my pet peeves is when people use the word 'we' inappropriately. More specifically, I literally cringe when I hear a couple expecting a child say "we are pregnant." No, no you are not. A man literally cannot be pregnant (except for that Oprah guy, but he doesn't really count). It is just plain ol incorrect, and I can say that because I have been pregnant and I assure you, Kev was not.

When I first became an Army girlfriend, I was surprised at the number of women attached to Army men who referred to themselves as 'in the army'. Phrases like 'we are staying in the Army', 'we are going to branch detail to X' and 'we have been through 2 deployements' used to just confuse me. In the beginning, it was worthy of a 'we are pregnant' cringe and I would always have to mutter under my breath 'you are not in the army, your boyfriend/husband is."

However, almost 5 years later, I understand it. The military is the only profession in which a spouse is correct to say "we." The Army takes so much of the family into consideration. The active member gets a salary which compensates for his/her dependants. There are groups specifically for families who meet on a regular basis and provide support to their members. Ginna has a wonderful story that hopefully she will share one day about a company commander who asked her opinion of an assignment that Tyler was going to get, not because he needed her permission, but because he truly cared about them. I guarantee that does not happen in the civilian world.

About a month ago when Kev was deciding whether to get out or stay in, it was always our decision. Never once did he say "what should I do?" It was always, always "what should we do?" And now that I am comfortable using the phrase, I have to tell you how proud I am to be able to say it. We are staying in the Army. We will continue to be part of this great community. We will take new, challenging assignments and hopefully we will be able to mentor young families under Kev's command. We will deal with deployments as/if/when they come. We will get through them together. We agree to move every few years and completely accept it. Sometimes, (most of the time), even we get up for PT in the morning...the alarm usually wakes me up first.

Army life can be straining, but its comforting to know that they care about my entire family, not just my husband. When Cullen was born, Kev's commander presented us with an engraved baby bowl and cup set during a Hail and Farewell. It was such a neat and unexpected moment for me to see my baby boy be 'hailed' into this larger family we are a part of. We are a we because others genuinely care about us. We are a we because spouses and families are invited to join in military traditions. Do our civilian friends come to the office when a boss gets promoted? I don't think so.

So go ahead, say it with me, We are in the Army. This phrase is not only physically possible but 100% accurate.

Happy Hump Day!
-Kate